This Week’s Quotation:

Have you ever succeeded in controlling your emotions through mental willpower? I doubt it. You might be a master of repression, but usually that only works for so long. As human beings are out of touch with the spiritual reality within them, they cannot master their emotions.

Emotional mastery takes emotional surrender. It implies being mastered by what you’re surrendering to. And the only way that real emotional mastery comes is as the emotional body surrenders to the unseen.

Becoming a Sun p. 290

How Do You Reach Emotional Mastery?

David Karchere
David Karchere
Author, Becoming a Sun

Sorry that I got so bossy in this paragraph from my book. But emotional intelligence is a topic I am passionate about. It is so vital and so generally misunderstood.

In most of the literature on emotional intelligence that I am aware of, there are huge gaps in the understanding of the nature of the human emotional body. So often, it is treated as if it is another means of performance in the world, much the way an athlete might build their biceps, or a singer might train their voice.

Even the phrase “emotional mastery” evokes the image of tight control.

Here’s the problem as I see it. The human intellect isn’t made to control the human heart. We are just not made that way. Sure, our thoughts have a part to play in fostering a healthy emotional experience. But the source of that experience doesn’t come from the human mind.

The best word we have in the English language for that source is Love. And I am speaking about agape—Universal Love. That kind of Love is born out of the spiritual nature of humankind.

Wouldn’t you say that your own heart is most healthy and happy when Love prevails there? I know that is true for me. And if it doesn’t, what other energies are getting in there to erode the human experience?

Here’s what I know. The most intelligent guidance the human mind has to offer to our emotional body is this: Surrender to Love! Let Love rule!

What if we looked at all phases of emotional experience as opportunities to let Love in so it could express itself through us? What if all human wisdom is rooted in this simple imperative? Maybe that’s emotional mastery.

Let’s be kind to our own human heart and nourish it with what it truly needs—Love flowing into it from within and flowing through it to the world.


What does it mean to become a sun?

Every human being is already a sun on the inside—a being of intense love and light. The difference is that some people have the vision and courage to become a sun on the outside. This difference is our human destiny.

4 Responses

  1. Any fantasies we may hold about emotional mastery are quickly dispelled when someone or some event comes along to push our buttons. Of course, when someone does that, they are rendering a service. Otherwise we might go merrily along living in a fantasy land. How much better to do as you suggest, David, and allow love to reign supreme.

    1. When I consider the application of vision and courage and what would that take for me in practice, it would be to go in and connect with that ever-shining sun center and let it radiate through me, suffusing actions with that golden essence.

  2. How do I reach emotional mastery? Staying in touch with my inner spiritual reality, that is the simple answer. But emotion has a way of cutting right through whatever my mind says.  So instead of letting mind fight with emotions, I focus on my breath. I breathe deeply, and slowly, with gratitude for the greater Breath of Life available through me, until the emotions lose their power. 

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