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Relationship All-In



Becoming a Sun

by David Karchere

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This Week’s Quotation:

When it comes to relationship, being all-in doesn’t necessarily mean that you have a lifelong commitment. It means that you are fully present and committed to whatever kind of relationship this is meant to be. It might be a life partner; it might be a business partner. It might be a friend or a brother or a sister. Being all-in changes any relationship.

Becoming a Sun p. 284

Relationship All-In

David Karchere
Author, Becoming a Sun

There is an unwritten law governing all relationships. It is simply this: Every relationship has a creative size, shape, proximity, and longevity.

The corollary to this law is that trying to make a relationship something it isn’t meant to be brings suffering.

Being all-in with anyone means that you perceive the nature of the relationship, and you are totally there for that. It is celebrating what is true of that relationship and letting it be what it is.

Some people are meant to be on the other side of the world, away from you. Can you be all-in for that? Can you just let that relationship be what it is? Distant.

There might be someone who is meant to be an intimate partner for a lifetime. If so, will you let them in? Will you allow that relationship to take its natural size and proportion in your life?

Then there is every friendship, creative alliance, and working partnership in between. Any one of them might seem like a limited thing—something temporary, unimportant, or purely utilitarian. But what if you were all-in for whatever it was? My experience tells me that relationships that seemed ordinary had the potential for great enjoyment and fulfillment.

I can’t remember when I decided that the spiritual generation available to me in any relationship meant more to me than the functional requirements—the work to be done or the practical necessities involved. But I did. And that changed everything. The functional requirements were fulfilled more easily. And I had the joy and fulfillment of friendship that was unique to that relationship.

And so, dear reader, I am all-in for what we share through this blog and all that might arise from it. Let us see what that is.

What does it mean to become a sun?

Every human being is already a sun on the inside—a being of intense love and light. The difference is that some people have the vision and courage to become a sun on the outside. This difference is our human destiny.

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Katie-Grace
Katie-Grace
February 16, 2022 10:48 am

Being All In is different in each relationship perhaps – if we feel that we are all in – and the recipient feels it too – then we are all in. The tricky part may be – do we both have the same sense of All In? I think Jerry’s concept of evaluating or re-valuating is a real blessing. And with the multiple truths in Karen’s and Linda’s responses – All In may always need to be evaluated – within our love for ourselves as well.

Jerry Kvasnicka
Jerry Kvasnicka
February 7, 2022 10:23 am

How absolutely true it is that every relationship has a creative size, shape, proximity, and longevity. This really came home to me in relation to my marriage in 1980. My wife and I agreed to evaluate our relationship every six months and make a decision on whether our partnership should continue for another six months.

After nine six-month cycles we decided that our individual spiritual effectiveness would be better served if we discontinued the partnership. And so we did with no regrets, realizing that spiritual generation trumps loyalty to any human relationship.

Karen Pritchard
Karen Pritchard
February 4, 2022 7:34 pm

Being a woman, mother, grandmother, life partner., daughter, sister, aunt, friend, teacher, pet owner, homeowner activist in this today seems to.give the whole a cellular shake up to be activated enough to be present. Let alone attempting to be All in One.

What else can one do but be All in One as the above line up of relationship commitments require. For me – A woman’s work is never truly fully done. The implications of imbalance still seem to be present if one is fully activated consciously, consistently and conscientiously. There is no time for the pause button when one is fully activated in being aware of living in the reality of truth in each now – it is hard work, physically and emotionally.

The heart, mind and body are but a whole to function in conscious coordination, without guilt or blame, labelling or expectation. If one is fully present which I know a great many are, then the All in One state is naturally functioning without control or judgement.

To activate the buttons of the whole is key and then the fully functioning holy self is ready to take it All on. Even a master at keeping All the balls in the air can drop one ball yet should he ever be judged ?

No, because even the Master ought to be loved into his becoming. For we are all the masters of our own becoming. And having those consciously present about us when we drop our ball will always be there to help and pick it up and hand it back to us in the ALL IN ONE – supporting us and do it with too with presence and unconditional Love.

We all fail at times even when we try our hardest to be All for everyone and yes women still seem to be the All Rounders in this life arena. Giving and giving with an open loving heart.

There is still so much more to do to encompass unconditionally the All in One state. It is a huge undertaking if one is asking for more of another.

Yet, when one is naturally aligned into its true understanding ALL in ONE state, then surely the unconditional takes precedence and is expanded into the ease of multi tasking towards the Whole, the conscious capacity of self and giving All in Oneness anyway..

Linda
Linda
February 4, 2022 3:45 pm

Your words ring so true, David. Thank you. I discover daily that all relationships have huge nourishing value. WhenI am all-in doors open to remarkable reciprocity and magic!

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